Yesterday was a full day in that I felt I was learning a lot all of a sudden. I am continuing to try to put off my worry, with the help and accountability of some good friends. It really makes ny life so much richer to have people around me in my house and in my conversations who really honestly care about where they are going with God. This would be a time for worry because of all this future plan stuff. But I honestly have been feeling more and more sure that whatever is going on behind the scenes right now is what needs to happen for my next step.

I was also thinking last night about what I have and what I think I am entitled to. I think about entitlement a lot regarding Americans. I have SO much and I call it my own; my job, my friends, my clothes, my time. That last one is big. Even though my life has such blessing and comfort, I still get so frustrated if I don't have as much of MY free time as I want to have to rest and to play. But last night got me thinking about what I see as 'mine'.

Our neighbor Thomas struggles with money and has a wife with diabetes and four kids of all ages and he comes over at least once a week to ask for money. It has been awkward because we don't make much money this year. Ironically, that smaller salary plays on my temptation even more to call my money my own and to be possessive of it. We have all in the house struggled with trusting Thomas' stories. We decided to take a new approach and invite him and his family to dinner last night and he said he was coming up to the day before but he never showed up. During dinner I sadly confessed to my housemates that my first reaction was relief. How excited I get to engage the power structures about the issue of poverty, but when really confronted with it, how much I seem to retreat. Why? I know why. Because it is just so easy to engage in issues that are going on far away from me, but if I engage with people and issues that are close to home, that is going to invade my personal time and space that I treasure a lot more than I realized. That was a startling thing to notice about myself and I am going to pray on it because I think it is something that Sojourners hoped we would learn this year in our 'simple living'.

Anyway, there is more I could say, but I will cut it off there. Today looks like it will be a good day.