It does not FEEL like the last day of my last Christmas break. The time kind of got away from me, but overall I am satisfied. I am ready to go back. I am going on an alumni retreat with my old youth group from St. Pius back in Bowie. The focus of the retreat will be on the Eucharist. I'm not sure if that is strictly Catholic terminology, but Eucharist=Communion. I think this will be a worthwhile transition.

Last night was a GREAT last night too because Sarah and I just hung out all night long watching Nick at Nite, reading this great book together and discussing where we are at in our faith and where we hope to go, and talking ourselves to sleep. Interesting because we are both sort of in the same position at different places on the spectrum. See, Sarah has been questioning her faith a lot late;y and wondering what she truly believes anymore or just believes out of habit. Going to a liberal school and dating a man who does not claim to be a Christian contributes, but I think this is just a time she is supposed to be doing this. God is not scared of her questions, but she is scared to ask. She feels kind of alone where she is in her walk. And I do too. But, in contrast, I am at a point where I just want the simplicity I felt at first to come again into my faith. I am tired of complicating everything. I just want to let myself fall back and feel God catch me. I want to throw myself into His arms. And I know many of my friends feel the same way but sometimes true, engaging Christian community doesnt seem very easily accessible. But....

a) If I want community, so much of that is up to me to pursue it more.
b) maybe I am overestimating how much others are supposed to play a part in walking with you and supporting you. Certainly they are supposed to be there. We need each other. But maybe there is a great deal of our faith that, in order to remain something we cherish very personally, must remain our own.


I plan to think about this some more this weekend and this semester and I'm looking forward to it. Is there any place better than a college senior at Eastern to do so? :)