Tonight because I love "Garden State" so much, I watched "The Last Kiss", the new Zach Braff movie. I think Garden State is much more hopeful and about a lot more life stuff. This one is more about relationships, but as always with ZB, it deals with the moment when relationships clash with this whole, new, quarter-life crisis thing. Now, of course, it is no coincidence that I am choosing to watch this at this point in my life, but....whatever.
What I really like about the movie is the ambiguous ending and the realistic dialogue. It feels painfully true to what really happens to us. The main plot point around Zach and his girl is that he gets freaked wondering "is this it?" Even though what he has is great, it just seems like he can predict everything that is going to happen, no more surprises. That really is scary. I get that. As you can tell from my last entry, sometimes I get really scared thinking about the future. I get scared nailing myself down without options. I wonder if I could have a completely different life that would make me happier....but I don't think all that wondering has made my life any better.
For instance, right now. Right now, I wonder if I could be happier doing something more adventurous or independent. Or I wonder if I would still be in my super-tight relationship if I had done things differently, and what we might be doing together. But I went for a run today and stretching outside on my porch and seeing the sun come out over my neighborhood, I was thinking that I have four whole months in this strangely idyllic place where I am fed and well loved. Why fight it? Why not just enjoy it? So I'm gonna give it a try.
First day at my church tomorrow. I'll let you know how it goes.
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